c'è l'hai un bel culo.

As I was in search for how to say something sucks in Italian (fa schifo) I came across a site for the book An Italian Affair by Laura Fraser. Apparently, from the descriptions, it's basically Under the Tuscan Sun but with more international humping. The site for the book, which proports itself to be a true story, contains interviews with and essays by Fraser, pictures of things mentioned in the book and a sample chapter. But the most intriguing thing was the list of Handy Italian Phrases for Lovers. It had a list of the basic ("ciao" is "hello/goodbye," "piacere" is "please to meet you") and some not-so-basic phrases ("No, mi dispiace, non ho neanche una goccia di sangue italiano" meaning "No, unfortunately, I don't have a drop of Italian blood"). The interesting part, one that is eased into, are the ones really for "lovers." Some examples:

I'd love to have dinner with you. -- Sarebbe un piacere cenare insieme. Dinner was delicious. What's for dessert? -- La cena era squisita. Cosa c'è per dolce? Kiss me. -- Baciami. Maybe we'd better stop. -- Forse dovremmo smettere. No, don't stop. -- No, non smettere. Take off my clothes. -- Spogliami. Slower. -- Piu piano. Faster. -- Piu in fretta. You're going to kill me.-- Mi ammazzarai. That was incredible. -- Era incredibile.

Enough material for Katie to make many, many jokes.